Letter I got that touched my heart

Well Miss Wendy,

I am sadly leaving for the summer buuut before i go i wanted to tell you how awesome it was to get to know you this semester, and how nice it was to look forward to working on Thursdays I am not sure that you are told this enough, but i do hope that you believe it--> you are AMAZING! Your boys are so lucky to have a momma as great as you. I think you are one the strongest working women that i know, school, work, children, taking care of your mother, and becoming a Beach Body coach, and battling your own body image insecurities WOWZA. You are leading a life that others look up to more than i am sure you realize.

I believe that this summer will treat you well. I hope that you go into it setting obtainable goals, and encourage others to take the challenge with you! I am looking forward to seeing a new you in the fall.

Have a good summer miss Wendy, and always know that you are a beautiful soul and perfect in every way that you come!

Take care, Much love--- Mandy

Summer is approaching!

I'm really looking forward to this summer with the boys.  The last time that I had a good summer I was much heavier (220 pounds!) and Christopher was around 18 months old.  We were living in Atascadero California and I fell in love with Central California.  I hope that one day I can return and hit up wine country again, and see ALL of my friends that I had to leave behind. 
This summer I'm in much better physical shape, and can keep up with my kids without getting completely worn out.  I'm also going to be doing p90x this summer, and I'm really excited to see if I can hit my goal weight by the end of the summer. 
This definitely is going to be a great summer.  The only thing I am waiting on is for the weather to agree with me and turn beautiful like I know it can.  Marquette is one of the prettiest places in the country, and this summer I'm going to be exploring with my kids places that I have never shown any interest in.  Maybe I'll even take them up Sugar Loaf.  . . . Maybe not.  The thought of it still sends chills up my back.  I'm terrified that one of them would fall.  We'll see!!

Securing a self image

I read a bumper sticker the other day that said something along the lines of "women who follow the rules don't make history!"  I also was listening to a motivational speaker on CD who said that life isn't worth living if you don't offend someone.  This really got me thinking. 
Last year I would do whatever I could to NOT offend anyone.  To agree with people just to avoid a conflict or discussion.  This might not sound like a big deal but it really limited me and how I could grow as a person.
Starting last year I started making more decisions and taking so much more into effect when thinking about my life, and more especially my sons lives.  I have ALWAYS done what is best for my boys, but I didn't realize that not knowing who I was limited me in helping my sons grow. 
I am thankful that I figured this out before it has any effect on my boys.  They are my life.
I have stepped out on my own, I am self supporting, and I am now loving my life!!
I use to look at life and judge other people's happiness.  I wanted to be the happy girl, the one that walked around and didn't care about what others thought about her because she was secure about her own self image.  I believe that I am to that point.  I have lost 60 pounds, and am confident that I am looking better than ever before, and making the correct life decisions that are going to allow me to go far. 
Something to talk about later is going to be restraint. . . Thanks for listening to my crazy thoughts!!

Times are changing

This past year has been something I completely have not expected.  I've had my second child, I moved to Michigan, I separated from my husband and became officially divorced from him recently, my mother has come to live with me (she has had 2 open heart surgeries and I have been caring for her, nursing her back to health), I have gone back to school full time, I have started working again (part time jobs), and I have started my own Beach Body business which has helped me in ways that I will forever be grateful for. 
I'm not going to lie, it has been a LOT to deal with.  I have definitely had my ups and downs.  For personal reasons I have choose NOT to air a lot of my personal frustrations on Social Media sites.  Which has worked well and against me.  I do think that this was the right decision to NOT share my troubles on facebook, because I think it often comes across as whinning.  Also it has really help me be a better person, I'm no longer always focusing on the bad things in life.  If I didn't have anything positive to say, I just didn't say anything at all.  However I do believe it is important to let other people know that I have been struggling, so that I can get the support that I need to continue on and be happy.
Looking back at this past year, I have a lot of sad memories, but also have been given a lot of different opportunities that I don't believe would have been possible if those sad events occurred.  I want people to know that by no means was my divorce "easy."  My decision to leave David still haunts me, as just recently I came to the realization that my marriage was over.  It will take time to adjust, and I am doing everything I can to make my life, and my sons lives better than they ever could have managed.
I never imagined myself as 25 years old, mother of 2 children, single and alone. . . divorced.  I have lost quite a few friends that did not approve of my situation and decision to divorce which only added more pain to an already tender situation.  However I am glad that I have discovered who my true friends are.  Friends that didn't necessarily (or DID) agree with my situation, but stood by my side anyway.  They let me vent my frustrations, and keep my emotions private.  Who gave me their best advice (even though sometimes I didn't take it) and made me feel like I was loved.

Friends:  I can't tell you what you have done for me in this past year.  Without you, none of this (school, beachbody, happiness) would have been possible.  Thank you for letting me lean on you in my times of need.  I promise that I will be there for each and every one of you when you are having difficult times.  You helped me hold my head up, even when I wanted to crawl back in bed and pretend like none of this had ever happened. I will be forever in your debt, and always your true friend.